The Solution to Grief

The death of a loved one isn’t easy to overcome. When someone dear to our heart dies, it brings forth emotional, mental, and spiritual pain. Our lives change, and their physical presence is no longer available.

This situation becomes a challenge because grief emerges.

Some factors cause different levels of grief. For example, when a mother loses a child, it is excruciating, especially when the child is young. The death of a parent taken at a young age brings some of the same hurt. Diseases, cancer, and other sickness also are complex to accept and move past. Murder or suicide is just as devastating. These are but a few incidents that cause grief.

Grief is the most significant test for discovering relief from the passing away of someone we have strong affection towards. Bereavement is a universal experience shared by us all. No one can avoid the death of a loved one, and for this reason, we all know it affects our self-esteem.

The Five Stages of Grief

There are five standard stages of grief. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance are the primary phases we face. Each of these difficult circumstances causes us problems in our everyday life. They disrupt our spiritual condition, family relations, employment, and social settings.   

• Denial: Denying the person’s death is a typical reaction. It’s shocking news that someone we know died. So, to deny is a natural way of feeling.
• Anger: Another emotion associated with death is anger. It’s not surprising that anger surfaces and resentment toward the circumstances that caused the death. To even be angry at the person who died isn’t outside the expected reaction.
• Bargaining: Bargaining is a stage where blaming someone or the person themselves emerges. This stage can also make us believe we are to blame.
• Depression: Felling depressed over the death of a loved one is perhaps the hardest one to survive. Intense sorrow is a normal reaction to the passing away of someone we cherish. It hits deep into our souls.
• Acceptance: The final stage of grief is acceptance. When we’re able to consent to the death of a loved one, it relieves us from the other four stages. This phase of the grieving process opens the door to healing.

Given these points, grief from the death of someone we show profound affection towards has a direct effect on our lives. Some people never get over the grieving experience.

With that said, how can I overcome these devastating emotions?

Grief’s Solution

God solves the paralyzing grip of grief. However, He doesn’t work in our way of thinking. No, His response comes at the time we need it the most. A point often overlooked is that God’s timetable differs from how the world views time. Remember, He is omniscient (Psalm 147:5).

Many people doubt God and His ability to relieve oneself from the suffering grief causes. They are eager to discount or disbelieve in Him. But, the fact of all true believers is that He never fails to comfort His chosen people (1 Peter 5:7).

In the Old Testament, one of the most insightful solutions to grief unveils itself in the Book of Proverbs:

Solomon spoke God’s truth:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6, NKJV)

These two scriptures unpack a faith anchored in trust through reliance on God. He always leads me to a path that unlatches the door to a solution with grief and all trials and tribulations. From this action, He will lead me to the path that helps me overcome the stages of grief.

When I stand firm in trusting God, even when I think He isn’t close by, it always turns out better than I foresee. This action takes perseverance (James 5:11), and the results are incredible. Without fail, I experience an inner peace where grief evaporates, and His love fills my heart. This experience motivates me to draw even closer to Him!

An even more excellent solution to grief is abiding in Christ. When God delivered Jesus into the world, He made Him the only way (John 14:6). Indeed, it is Christ who provides us with an eternal solution (John 3:16) where God will take away a believer’s pain and suffering (Revelation 21:4).

Christ said:

 Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30, NKJV)

Jesus tells me that when I turn to Him in despair, He will step in and lessen the pain in my soul. This revelation shows me the wisdom behind God’s plan of making Christ the way to everlasting life. Through faith in Jesus, grief loses its effectiveness, and I discover a supernatural courage and strength that weren’t available under my limited power.

Prayer

Prayer is the key to unlocking God’s healing hand and works in all circumstances, including grief. All that is required to get this incredible gift is to ask in Christ’s name (John 15:7) without reservation, and God will provide the wisdom to overcome grief (James 1:6).

Each of us bears testimony to the power of prayer. God answers us with provisions we can’t provide ourselves. As the result of prayer, He helps us with finances, employment, and amending broken relationships. This proves His omnipotence, so prayer is a significant way to move beyond grief.

Apostle Paul said this about prayer:

Rejoice always,pray continually,give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, NIV)

 Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving; (Colossians 4:2, NASB)

As shown above, prayer is an essential and crucial part of salvation. It is as critical to food and water for our physical survival. Without prayer, the solution to grief stays elusive.

Christ constantly prayed (Matthew 14:23, Luke 5:16). If Jesus showed the importance of communicating with God, shouldn’t we do the same?

Yes, prayer is our sole resource of God’s consciousness. Through the Holy Spirit, He reveals Himself; prayer is the reason.

My Experience

Recently, my oldest brother, Robert, died. The funeral is on Saturday. When I heard the news, it brought sorrow. I shed tears, and my heart saddened.

However, through faith in Christ and reliance on God’s solution, I quickly accepted his death. I followed the blueprint of prayer, faith, and trusting the Lord’s guidance.

Robert believed in the Holy Trinity (God, Christ, Holy Spirit) and lived according to the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). His unshakable faith allowed me to know he is with God in heaven. Even though I’ll miss him, we will see each other again.

Nineteen years ago, my dad died. I used the same actions, and the results were as effective. The same biblical outline was my course of action, leading me to God’s compassion and grace.

This is my experience; yours may differ.

Suffering

Suffering isn’t a popular discussion because none of us enjoy this unavoidable encounter. Salvation isn’t the absence of suffering. Faith in Christ doesn’t eradicate suffering but provides the courage to endure its unfavorable circumstances.

Some Christians experience immense suffering over the death of a loved one. They can’t seem to find relief from grief. They may be stuck in anger and depression. This doesn’t mean their faith isn’t working (Romans 8:18). It shows that death is difficult to accept and escape. This doesn’t mean God abandons believers. It’s important to remember that He provides relief when He intends to do so.

Jesus suffered a horrible and tragic death (Mark 8:31), and God allowed this to happen.

If Christ suffered, what makes us the exception?

God promises the end of suffering. This will occur when Christ returns (Matthew 24:30-31). Until then, the pain of life outside the Garden of Eden continues.

Final Thoughts

Given these points, the solution to overcoming death’s reality centers on devotion to God. I know this is a lot to consider. Some aspects of life take time to explain. I hope this helps. I’m grateful God crossed our paths.

What’s your outlook?